This morning we met with AVEGA the association of widows of the genocide. They began as a small organization of about 50 women survivors of the genocide, who met together to mourn their losses, having had no time until then to do anything but survive, and no one who understood them but each other. They grew into a country wide organization supported by the government with 25,000 members, if memory serves me. They offer social support, medical support, psychological counseling if needed, and financial help. Althogether a remarkable grass roots organization that evolved to meet social needs.
In my view, the exemplify a new trauma paradigm. In the West trauma is conceptualized as something that happens to individuals, and so individual therapy is the treatment of choice. In Rwanda the primary "treatment" is group meetings where the women can share experiences, learn that they are not alone, and provide mutual aid. Individual therapy is an adjunct to group meetings, rather than the other way around. They asked for my suggestions and I suggested several things
1. Psychoeducation, so that people learn what is happening to them, and that they are not weak or mad or bad. Psychoeducation provides normalization.
2. Group meetings for the children, as well as the mothers.
3. Group meetings for mothers and children together, to facilitate them talking about things that they all know about but find it hard to speak of. For example, who their father is, or if the child is the product of a multiple rape, that this is the case. (I imagine the blog readers horrified at this, and truly there is much that is horrible about their situation.)
4. Some communal education and meeting, again to speak about what is happening and gossipped about.
After our meeting we had lunch at a small buffet restaurant and Eric (our driver), Cecile (our interpeter), Denise and I talked about life. The conversation gave me a feel for the communal culture of Rwanda and how it is changing. For example, children used to feel free to live in their parents household without contributing anything. Now a financial contribution is expected if at all possible. Another example, at the level of private life. Hutus and Tutsi's can now date, and often do, or even agree to live together. But should they want to get married they have to consult their families, who will often object and may be able to veto the marriage. The reason for objection is the past history of violence.
I don't know what the world will look like to me when I return, but I'm sure that it won't be the same.
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AVEGA's development as an organization is reminiscent of the rape crisis movement in the U.S. in the 1970s, a grassroots coming together of women with a shared traumatic experience as well as other women who sought to be of support. Many argue that the movement was "co-opted" by professionals who came to the scene and claimed that their skills were needed.
ReplyDeleteI want to echo Louise's request that you take good care of yourselves!
Hi Carl - it sounds like things are going better and better! so glad this is working out so well!!
ReplyDeleteYou might suggest PAR projects, rather than simply talking in groups - like drawing - pics of their dead husbands parents, children; writing journals or letters to their dead loved ones; taking pics, making a video etc.
Then organizing some kind of public performance where they present all of this stuff. or meeting with officials to ask for things they need, etc. The final action component will emerge from their needs.
They will prbly need money to buy cameras, paper, etc. which we can help raise and send to them.
This wld be especially true for children - pics of their old homes, lost pets, etc.
Can't wait to see you and hear all of the details!
Love to you and Denise.